Chapter Title: The Loneliest Rule


There came a point when the club wasn’t just an organization—it became a wall. A barrier between people who loved each other. Somewhere along the way, its rules stopped being about sport or safety and started becoming about control.

I was told, in so many words, that friends and family weren’t welcome. That we had to “stay out of it,” as if kindness and support were somehow threats to their structure. They told Josephine she had to choose. Not just what days to train or compete—but when, or even if, she could see me.

Imagine being told when you’re allowed to visit a friend. Imagine being told that because you’re not a coach, not a parent, not a staff member, you don’t matter. That the bond you built through grief, meals shared, nights spent talking, and care given in silence means nothing once someone puts on a tracksuit.

It wasn’t her choice—not really. The choice was forced, filtered through pressure, routine, and the unspoken threat that she might lose her place in the only thing left in her life that resembled stability.

So, I was left out. Alone. Because of a rule. Because someone, somewhere, decided that friends like me weren’t welcome anymore.

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